Keep Your Stress in Check

by JOELLE HADLEY

We use "stressed out" as a euphemism to describe feeling overwhelmed with life and work or when things just aren't going the way we expected them. The stress response is part of the physiological makeup of every animal species' brain, including humans, and it stems from a change in our brain and body chemistry.

Chemicals, blood, oxygen and toxins are "stolen" from the brain and sent to the rest of the body to give us extra strength to "protect" ourselves-which is why we feel the way we feel when we are stressed. Thousands of years ago, physical threats and survival were the main triggers of stress. Today, threats are commonly about emotional survival, protecting our egos, preserving our well-being and achieving a high quality of life. But when we are hurt, disappointed or feel as if we have lost control, our body still responds as if we are being chased by a lion in the jungle.

There are a variety of choices for dealing with stress based on lifestyle, personality and levels of stress. Using different options to cope with stress properly can dramatically improve your professional and personal life.

CHANGE YOUR LANGUAGE.

Words are extremely powerful and represent visual images that trigger quick responses in the brain. Hearing, saying or even thinking the word "stress" creates an image and feeling of being out of control, frenzied, hurried or unhappy. Be mindful of how often you think and talk about stress.

UNDER-PROMISE AND OVER-DELIVER.

Part of feeling stressed is fear that we are going to disappoint someone or disappoint ourselves for not following through with a commitment or expectation. When we disappoint ourselves or someone else, our brain views this disappointment as a "threat" to our self-image and reputation. Learning to manage your commitments and avoiding an unmanageable workload will greatly reduce your feeling of having too much to do and not enough time. Balance is key-if you say "yes" to one thing, you must say "no" to another thing.

MOVE YOUR BODY DAILY.

Keeping your body active is a great way to deal with stress. Try to do some kind of physical activity on a daily basis. Strong cardio is the best type of movement, but there are other options as well. Take a walk, dance to your favorite music, jump rope, hike the beautiful mountains, ride your bike or go to a batting cage. Find something you enjoy doing and add it to your daily routine.

MANAGE YOUR HALTed STATES.

HALT stands for hungry, angry, lonely and tired. Any one of combination of these four states will trigger your primitive brain and increase feelings of threat, making you feel edgy and stressed if they are not managed on a proactive basis.

Hungry: Since the body needs regular food as fuel to stay alive, any absence of food when we are hungry signals the primitive part of our brains that we might not survive. This puts our body on high alert, turning off our thinking brain and making us feel threatened. Feed your body five to six times daily with small amounts of food.

Angry: When we become angry or disappointed and we don't share our strong emotions with someone else, we end up swallowing those feelings of anger. This can be toxic. Anger not dealt with can rear its head at another time when it is inappropriate. To avoid this, talk out your anger with the person who created it, talk to a counselor or write down your feelings on paper.

Lonely: As human beings, we all have spirits that need to connect and have a sense of belonging. We need to love others and we need to feel loved by others. Keeping strong connections with friends, family and coworkers is vital to our survival. Create and be active in social networks and feel the connection of other human beings.

Tired: Brains need sleep to process everything learned and experienced throughout the day. Our brains are actually more active at night than they are during the day. When we don't give our bodies and brains seven to eight hours of sleep each night, we put the "fight or flight" survival response on high alert and can become more sensitive and edgy.

PUT PEN TO PAPER.

In this age of technology, we have lost the importance of putting pen to paper. It's one of the most effective things you can do manage your stress and keep your sanity and peace of mind-not to mention getting more out of your day. Put pen to paper and start making lists.

List One-Dreams and Goals: When we aren't connecting to what we want-our motives and desires in life-we tend to live someone else's life, making us feel as though we are not being true to ourselves. Living an unauthentic life feels threatening to us, which causes the stress response in our brain. Know what you want; know what is important to you. write it down and put it in a place you can see the list each day.

List Two-Daily To Do List: Many of us go through our days trying to respond to the every whim of constant e-mail alerts and cell phone vibrations. Instead, start each day with a premade list of things you need to do and want to accomplish. Prioritize them and stick to the list as much as you can. It will serve as an anchor throughout your daily doses of crisis and change. Make the list the night before or first thing in the morning when your head is clear.

List Three-Your Thoughts: Whether you call it journaling, morning pages, ranting, raving, thinking on paper or therapy, or the important thing is to get the overwhelming thoughts, worries and feelings down on paper. Another powerful activity is to write down all the things you are grateful for in your life and your work. Sit down, start writing and fill the entire page top to bottom with whatever is on your mind. When you are finished, you can throw it away. Like an artist's blank canvas, your mind is now clear for skillful and creative thinking.

Paradoxically, stress is not the enemy. We need stress to stretch ourselves beyond our current capacity to grow and develop as human beings. It's when we don't take the time to recover from the stretching or when we attempt to do too much that we feel overwhelmed. Balancing commitments, keeping your body active and managing your HALTed states will help you cope with stress, allowing you to feel more positive, productive and peaceful about your life and your work.

Joelle Hadley is Founder of The Culture Coaches, a boutique management-consulting firm specializing in corporate culture. Her firm consults, coaches, trains and speaks on ways to create positive and productive work environments.